Well dilemmas dilemmas... When I was very little, I had a forgiving side to me. Certain friends would do stupid, hurtful things and I would forgive them. I remember rather vividly my mom asking me why I would do that. We were sitting on a green bench outside the front of my house. Damn that bench lasted way longer than it should of. I guess as a kid, I just figured that's what you do. You forgive.
Getting older however changes you. I've become more guarded and cynical when it comes to people. I still want to think the best of people and trust them, it's just hard to do once they hurt you. Holding hate in your heart and not forgiving is truely unhealthy. That's not my problem. I forgave long ago. Trust is totally different however.
I was deeply hurt this summer. Without going into detail, I was wronged by someone, they screwed up big time. This time I can truly say I did nothing wrong. I thought it was a done deal. Never see or talk to the person again. Get over any feelings for them and move on. Time heals all wounds. Now they went and apologized and want to rebuild some kind of relationship. I use "relationship" to describe any kind of friendly connection. Messed up my plans for sure. I have no idea what to do. Forgive, forget, let them back in my life. Just close the door and keep things as they were. Despite my best efforts, feelings still lay underneath my armor. They would go away though in time. Right now there isn't many options. Distance and priorities. The question however is what to do with feelings.
I wish I could return to how I was as a kid. I trusted people with such ease. You said your sorry and I said "ok". No questions asked. What happened to me that stole that part away. Maybe through some effort I can get back to that place. I want to sit on that bench again, as a boy turning into a man, and be able to once again say, "that's just what you do".
Oh kid next to me on the bus, are you retarded? You have a drool stain on your collar from last night. The stupid grin you wear won't go away. This language you slur is new to me. What do those hand signs mean? Are you having a seizure? Someone get help! Stop the bus! 911! Oh wait, your in a frat. Nevermind. False alarm.
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Sprint PCS Mail
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Sprint PCS Mail
10/24/08
I think we can all agree that some places deserve to be cell phone free. Libraries, churches, movie theaters, sleep clinics; the basic quiet zones. Lets, as a collective society, add bathrooms to that list. I know some of you might be thinking, "what's wrong with the bathroom? It's a quiet place, out of the way, where I won't disturb anyone." In a way I guess your right. Nobody actually needs the bathroom to be quiet. Not like washing your hands requires your complete undivided attention, attention that will be lost if someone is hanging out talking to a business associate while doing their business. But lets really think about what your doing here. Your having a polite, often times formal, conversation while a few feet away someone is performing a rather private act. I don't know about you but I don't want to be standing at a urinal with some guy yakking next to me. Oh and the best is when they are taking care of nature's call while on the phone. Does the person on the other end know why your voice has an echo to it all of a sudden? "Sorry Jim, did you just enter a cave?"
I know you ladies may feel very differently about this. You girls go in groups and turn the act into a social event. Sometimes it seems right up there with tea parties and showers. "We really don't see enough of each other Sandy. Why don't we meet up at the bathroom on the third floor? Five o'clock good for you? All right it's a date." I know for a fact that some ladies rooms have couches and complete sitting areas. Yes I've seen them... I've come to accept that no women can go to the powder room alone. At least three must enter together. Women have taken the buddy system to a level men will never achieve. Just do everyone a favor and leave the cell phones in the bags.
So here's the proposal, to both sexes. Leave the cell phone talk out of the bathrooms. It makes for an uncomfortable situation for those around you and is kind of creepy. I assure you, if the person your talking to knew where you were they would agree with me completely. Oh and don't forget to wash your hands...WITH SOAP!
I know you ladies may feel very differently about this. You girls go in groups and turn the act into a social event. Sometimes it seems right up there with tea parties and showers. "We really don't see enough of each other Sandy. Why don't we meet up at the bathroom on the third floor? Five o'clock good for you? All right it's a date." I know for a fact that some ladies rooms have couches and complete sitting areas. Yes I've seen them... I've come to accept that no women can go to the powder room alone. At least three must enter together. Women have taken the buddy system to a level men will never achieve. Just do everyone a favor and leave the cell phones in the bags.
So here's the proposal, to both sexes. Leave the cell phone talk out of the bathrooms. It makes for an uncomfortable situation for those around you and is kind of creepy. I assure you, if the person your talking to knew where you were they would agree with me completely. Oh and don't forget to wash your hands...WITH SOAP!
10/7/08
A quick note to those of you in the classroom... When passing papers, pass them to the person behind you. Don't go sideways to your buddy in another aisle or get up and hand it to someone across the room. We've been doing this for over 12 years now, you would think people would have it down. Really it's a simple concept. Apparently the simplest things are the hardest for some people to understand and execute. That's what you get I guess for assuming college students know how to pass papers out.
10/1/08
You know what pisses me off to no end, more than pushy mothers and bad drivers combined? Flakes. Not the kind that you see in the kid's hair in front of you and that make you want to suggest a new shampoo. No, I'm talking about those people that can't keep a calender or simply don't care. "Want to hang out tomorrow, have lunch or something?" "Sure just give me a ring" Next day. "So where we going for lunch?" "Huh? Oh sorry I'm busy" or better yet, "ring ring ring... you've reached the mailbox of..." Yeah that last one kills me. They can't even be bothered to call or pick up the phone to say they can't come or do whatever. "oh he'll figure it out when I'm not there a few hours after we were supposed to meet up." If it's a memory thing start writing things down, set an alarm, get a personal secretary to follow you around. Maybe it's my fault. Every time I make plans with these people and they fail to hold up their end, you know the part where they actually show up, I'm surprised. Crazy I know. Repeat same actions, expect different results... But there I am again, waiting for someone I know ain't going to show. I've thought about double booking my time. That way I won't have wasted days when people decided to bail on me. Problem is then I'll be one of those people who flake when those who shall not be named actually do show up.
9/29/08
I don't want to get all sentimental on you guys. If you know me, that's just not my style. Sometimes though life throws you a curve ball. We can hid and play it safe. Not taking a chance and not risking getting hurt. Its the easy way out and yeah, would save us all a lot of grief and heart ache. That's the problem though. You got to hid from life to not risk feeling. Drama, pain, and all that shit is part of life and living. They make the rest all that more valuable. I say bring it on. Yeah I'll get a few bruises along the way, maybe a black eye or two, but at least I'll have some cool battle scares to show for it all at the end. Oh and the stories? Wait till you hear the stories.
Ok. I'm all done. You can stop making that gagging face. I promise no more sentimental stuff. Next post will be full of baby punching humor or something along those lines.
Ok. I'm all done. You can stop making that gagging face. I promise no more sentimental stuff. Next post will be full of baby punching humor or something along those lines.
9/21/08
Has anybody else experienced the awesomeness that is the auditorium in UC? There I am sitting in class, a few hundred kids surrounding me, when all of a sudden my chair starts to vibrate. Seriously, no coins needed. At first I'm pumped. I get to sit through Texas Politics while receiving a free message. What more can a guy ask for? After about ten minutes though I had enough. After some investigation I realized you can't turn these things off. I tried everything. No panel in the armrest, no hidden switch, no knob to turn. I even tried the clapper method, I passed it off as being overly supportive of some meaningless point made in the lecture. "Right on, Classical Liberalism is the bomb." Now I'm starting to get worried (and the guy next to me is worried for a different reason). Thirty minutes of vibrating can't be good for you. The students sitting next to me seem oblivious to my troubles. WTF! Just when I start to think the freaking chair is going to drive me crazy, I find the root of the problem. The little #$@%^& next to me is tapping her foot at such a high rate of speed and with such force she is actually moving the entire row of desks. "No No don't mind me, you go right ahead and shake like your off your meds. No, I always look this pissed off in the morning. It has nothing to do with the fact your constant shaking makes me want to smack you in the face with my spiral." I have no clue what was talked about in class, because I spent 45 minutes, yes 45 minutes, trying desperately to use my psychic abilities to will her leg from moving. I swear if class had gone on for just a few minutes she would of had a college rule notebook planted upside her head.
9/8/08
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